As mothers of young children and as professional counselors who support those going through transition and heart break, we want to share a little of what is on our minds and in our hearts during this back-to-school season.
The summer season represents time spent with intention, joy, and a rare speed that yields relaxation and freedom. Summer brings relaxed mornings, pool season, rising temperatures, late bedtimes, and best of all, the cherished tradition of summer camp. Summer exudes joyful predictability.
This year, however, the devastating Texas Hill Country floods have shattered that predictability and much of the ease of summertime. The sudden tragedy has left a profound mark on children, parents, friends, and the community. In those early hours of July 4th weekend, time stood still – not only for those in Texas, but worldwide. Tragedy infiltrated society. We mourned. Empathy became a communal experience. As mothers of young children, our hearts continue to ache and our thoughts transcend into deep questioning to try to make sense of this tragedy. We are individually and collectively in shock and mourning.
The pain of this disaster is undeniable, whether you were directly impacted or felt its ripple effects in some other way. It’s natural to grapple with intense emotions, questions, and a deep sense of loss. Yet, as seasons change and life continues to move forward, we seek to find a new equilibrium.
In counseling, we call this the “both-and” approach – the idea that two seemingly opposing forces can coexist in balance. It’s about acknowledging the complex reality of our current, complex experience:
- Grieving the loss of a predictable summer while embracing the changing seasons.
- Feeling both excitement and apprehension as a new school year begins, alongside the profound sorrow of loss.
- Carrying the heavy weight of the world while still finding the motivation to manage daily responsibilities.
Experiencing these conflicting emotions is a healthy part of processing loss. Transitions, like the start of a new school year, often shift our grief responses and prompt us toward what’s next. Whether we are ready or not, transition is upon us despite the undeniable pain many of us have experienced. The flooding that destroyed homes, disrupted lives, and tragically took many loved ones, has left a lasting emotional imprint. For many children and adults, the return to school is a significant transition. This year, it’s layered with the lingering grief and uncertainty from loss of classmates, friends, children, and predictability.
School can serve as a vital grounding force for children during times of crisis. We encourage educators, school staff, and parents to hold space for grief, even after the initial shock subsides. This doesn’t mean having all the answers, but rather fostering an environment where all feel seen, supported, and safe to express their emotions.
Just as school can help restore a sense of equilibrium, so too can the people within our community – places of worship, friends, families, coworkers and neighbors – serve as anchors for one another. Our shared responsibility is not to rush healing, but to meet each other with patience, presence, and compassion. By nurturing emotional well-being alongside other needs, we model resilience and remind everyone that they are not alone. It is empathy that will move us forward, together.
As this season of a new school year begins, remember:
- To the children: Your feelings are valid and worthy of acknowledgment.
- To the parents: Our empathy is with you as you navigate this transition while holding your children close.
- To the educators, school staff, and other mental health professionals: Your powerful work in supporting those entering your world is invaluable.
- To all: We see you. We’ll sit with you. We’ll breathe with you. We’ll cry with you.
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Co-written by:
Amanda Sherman, Licensed Professional Counselor
Diane Boehm, Licensed Professional Counselor and Registered Play Therapist